


the battle's now, my eyes are closed (no control)

by Clamat_Submissa



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: D/s, Fingering, Fluff, Grinding, Jealousy, M/M, Reality, Rimming, Shenanigans, a bit - Freeform, at one moment, but it's a bit, hints of D/s, i lost complete control over it idek how, like w a y too fluffy, loss of control over the entire plot by the author, louis is a prankster, maybe it was #nervousness, other moments he's a ball of fluff, seriously this fic is a mess, sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-23
Updated: 2014-11-23
Packaged: 2018-02-26 16:48:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,172
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2659253
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Clamat_Submissa/pseuds/Clamat_Submissa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>reality; moments consisting of Harry constantly saying cheesy pick-up lines to Louis, who just wants to lose control sometimes, In some ways.</p>
            </blockquote>





	the battle's now, my eyes are closed (no control)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [whoknows](https://archiveofourown.org/users/whoknows/gifts).



> so i tried hA 
> 
> I was admittedly v nervous because, well, I'm writing to one of my favorite authors. And also bc I didn't exactly understand that we had to pick one of the prompts, so I tried to mesh them all and agh it was a disaster
> 
> I admittedly lost control over the fic, um. I don't even know what happened. Like, everything is linked but I'm not sure I wrote it well enough for people other than me to understand? so
> 
> caution
> 
> but i did try my best so ayyyy. I've been working on this for quite a long time, so I just. Hope it isn't too bad.

_Harry should have expected it, it was just bound to happen someday, but it was an honest-to-heart surprise when Louis propositioned it._

_"Well? Do you want to or not?"_

_Harry felt his heartbeat go a mile a second, and the only words that tumbled out of his lips were "what?"_

_But Louis only smiled at him and walked gallantly at him, like a vulture circling his prey. "You said you were going to put me in my place. Was that all smack talk, or are you up to the challenge?"_

 

**July 1, 2012 - Bank Atlantic Center, Fort Lauderdale, Florida**

 

"Are you Amster? Because _dam_."

 

Louis had just walked into their hotel room after getting dressed up and ready for their last concert of the UAN tour in Lou's room, and he looked _spectacular_. He had on Liam's red plaid shirt and white pants, and he bore a beautiful Florida-sun tan that just enunciated all of his sharp facial features. So really, it wasn't _Harry_ 's fault the pick-up line was what he came up with once he saw him.

 

While he was calling himself an idiot for not using a better pick-up line, he saw something that made it all worth it: Louis's cheeks blazed up adorably and his flustered self just babbled on and on. "T-The show, last show, seven minutes. Start, Ft. Lauderdale, show starts. Varsity jacket." He literally threw Zayn's jacket onto his bed and practically ran away, the sound of his sneakers hitting the floor echoing for around a minute.

 

Harry would kill just to be able to see Louis like that again. Louis, who - despite his flamboyance- always held himself with power and authority and _strength_ , was a stuttering, blushing mess by a mere pick-up line. Harry had never seen a more beautiful scene in his entire life.

 

Throughout the concert, Louis couldn't keep his eyes off of Harry, and vice versa. Both sang their hearts out, looking at one another in the other's solos and verses, but with different intentions: Harry to smirk and tease, and see the lovely shade of red perpetually adorning Louis's cheeks; Louis to try and decipher what went on before, with a shy smile prompting the embarrassing blush Harry seemed to mock from afar.

 

And even backstage, after the concert, whenever their arms would touch it was as if a spark ignited. They'd recoil from shock yet always go back for more, instigating situations and occasions and opportunities for them to touch in some way. In fact, that night, they all decided to watch a movie together before they went to bed, and Louis and Harry sat together the entire time. It was a rom-com, something so cheesy that even Harry felt like killing himself while watching.

 

Louis, though. Louis loved it.

 

Louis was sniffling throughout the entire movie, tearful, lips red and chapped from the continuous biting and cheeks a glowing rose from crying. His nose was also red, adorably so, resembling Rudolph in a way that had Harry's heart clenching whenever he saw him.

 

The boys were all looking at Louis from time to time, laughing softly at seeing Louis so sensitive. Harry wanted to kill them at first, unsure how Louis was going to take it, but it seemed like Louis was more prepared and vicious than he gave him credit for.

 

"Well, you've all seen me crying, great," Louis stood up, wiped the tears from his eyes with the hem of his shirt, and put his hands on his hips as he gave all of them a strict stare. "If this gets out in any form, if I hear even a soft whisper about this while walking down the hallways, or find out you've told someone- even if it's your lovers- about this, I will personally cut each and every single one of your dicks and force-feed it to you until you puke… and then force-feed it to you _again_."

 

And, well, with that everyone seemed to get the idea.

 

The boys, Harry included, had dropped jaws and widened eyes. They seriously didn’t expect a threat like this from Louis but at the same time they _did_. It was so Louis, yet it _wasn't_ , and so on, so forth.

 

"Louis, don't you think that's a bit extreme?" Liam mumbled from the side softly, always the sensible one.

 

Louis looked at him, wide-eyed and looking rabid, yet there was something sad, melancholic about the way he held himself. "I'm not one of those tossers who is ashamed to cry; crying has nothing to do with my "male pride" or whatever the fuck I'm supposed to defend. But," his voice lowered as he continued on. "The media outlets and people who follow them already target my flamboyance and, for lack of a better word, _femininity_ … I wouldn't want them to have another reason to attack me."

 

The movie kept playing in the background, but it was as if a glass had shattered in a silent, deathly quiet room, and the pieces kept bouncing from the floor and breaking again and again and _again_. They all felt as if their hearts had been ripped out (Harry, all of his organs along with his soul, too) and could only feel sympathy for the beautiful, stressed boy who stood in front of them, desperately trying to seem tough to mask his agony.

 

It was truly a heartbreaking scene.

 

Louis noticed the shift, how could he not, and excused himself, making his way to the kitchen area of the hotel room. To prepare popcorn, probably. Liam, Zayn, Niall and Harry just looked at each other, silently asking one another _did you know about this?_ , but Louis was such a reserved person in that aspect that the only one who had the slightest chance of knowing, was Harry. And, to be honest, Harry had no fucking clue.

 

Harry needed to comfort him, check him, see if everything's okay. But before he has the chance to stand up, Niall did so. "I'm going to see if I can cheer him up," he said before making his way towards the kitchen as well.

 

Harry wasn't sure how but somehow, probably by telepathic agreement, the three remaining stood up and walked towards the door that separated the kitchen area from the living room area, to spy on the two of them. They couldn't catch much, having missed the first part, but what they heard was unbelievable.

 

"…not be Mumford, but would you like to have my sons?"

 

Zayn gasped a bit but Liam shut him up quickly, while Harry just stood there, feeling immobile, already dreading how Louis was going to respond. They all looked through the open side of the door, eavesdropping, and Louis's eyes were wide and mouth agape.

 

"Niall?"

 

"Yeah?" The Irish boy's accent thickened by the nervousness.

 

"I really do appreciate what you're doing, I do, but" Louis licked his lips and, with a soft and carefully coordinated and easily manipulative smile, put his hand on Niall's shoulder. "Don't hit on me, much less with stupid pick-up lines, I don't like that."

 

Niall nodded but, convinced by the smile, was grinning from ear to ear. "Just wanted to cheer you up!"

 

"Aw, love" Louis moved in and hugged him tightly, murmuring a small thanks before pulling away. He then noticed the three of them at the door and just narrowed his eyes, quickly walking over and screaming _are we going to watch this shit or not?!_ As he sat down. They all then sat again on the couch, smiling, happily thinking they were able to make Louis happy. But Harry knew better, and Louis knew so as well.

 

Maybe that's why when Harry was about to sit down next to Louis, the older lad took his hand and pulled at it. He stood up and demanded that Harry sit down where he was before. At first Harry was hesitant, but wanting to know where Louis was headed he obeyed, and was soon after met with a lapful of _Louis_. Harry had to hold himself from sighing in content at the marvelous feeling of Louis's short, soft, petite body on his own, his warm heat pressed against him… and his bum on his crotch. It was so, so splendid, Harry had to control himself from passing out right there and then.

 

The movie continued on, and Louis settled and melted into Harry soon enough. However, Harry was still a bit uncomfortable because he knew Louis was still sad, he just _knew_.

 

"Hey, Lou," Harry whispered in his ear softly, warm breath hitting the area, making Louis shiver. "Let me give you lessons, I'm sure I can make you hit all the high notes."

 

At that Louis gasped softly before erupting in continuous, contagious, beautiful laughter. His eyes were gleaming in glee, crinkles beside them, and his lips were quirked so upward he looked ethereal, like a pixie at that moment.

 

Maybe Harry was always the exception.

 

Starting from there, Harry's tended to use more and more pick-up lines on Louis whenever the smaller lad needed some cheering up, or just looked too amazingly for Harry to not comment anything. It's a habit nowadays, and Louis always reacted the same way - blushing horribly and getting all shy and nervous-. And it couldn't get more adorable.

 

When Louis wore his new, skin-sticking skinny jeans for the first time: "Are you from outer space? ‘Cause those thighs are out of this world."

 

When they were in Tennessee: "Are you from Tennessee? ‘Cause you're the only ten I see."

 

After a premier where they saw a little kid picking his nose: "If you were a booger, I'd pick you first."

 

Fun times, really, until the time came where Louis just didn't stick to the script.

 

**April 13, 2013 - Motorpoint Arena Sheffield, Sheffield, England**

 

They'd just finished the thirty-something show in their TMH tour, and Harry was almost bursting with desire for Louis. He was wearing a light blue tee with the sleeves rolled up and skinny jeans, and he couldn't have looked more sinful. The shirt clung to his body perfectly, showcasing his curves beautifully; his skinny jeans were so tight that Harry could make out his calves from afar, and they were rolled up at the end, making Harry's mouth water at the sight of his ankles; his sneakers just showed off how small and adorable Louis's feet are, and Harry felt like he was about to burst.

 

They were all huddled backstage, sweaty and a bit stinky, congratulating one another about the amazing show they just had. Harry jogged up to Louis, who was wiping off his sweat with a towel, and smirked at him. "Hey doll, I'm a pirate who's looking for some treasure. Can I check your chest?"

 

"Sure, as long as you don't touch my booty."

 

Harry's eyes widened in shock at not only Louis's answer but also the calm, flirty smile he casted his way and his relaxed stance. What the actual fuck. This hadn't happened before; in fact, there was nothing that could have prepared Harry for this. They had already fallen into a pattern, a pattern so intricate into their systems it seemed impossible to breach, to interfere with, to modify. Yet Louis always broke all of the rules stipulated. And there he was, with no precedent whatsoever, altering the pattern that was once second nature to them but now only a daunting memory left behind, assured and strong and _delighted_. Harry responded by letting out incoherent noises.

 

The rest were the same, all looking at Louis incredulously while laughing at Harry's stupor.

 

"What? B-But-."

 

"What, did you think I'd always remain silent?" Louis smirked at him and on his way out neared his lips to Harry's ear. "You're going to get shot down hard from now on, bub."

 

Now Harry was the stuttering mess, looking at Louis's retreating stance with an amazed glance as the lads just kept on laughing and laughing.

 

"That Tommo's getting fiercer as the days go by, right?" Niall drunkenly let out and, yeah, Louis was getting fiercer and more sarcastic and more mischievous. Harry really was going crazier and crazier for that boy.

 

Harry took that as his leave and made his way to their room; his and Louis's. His steps felt heavy, but that was probably due to the knots forming on his back from the body tension. Upon his arrival he hears a small gasp accompanied with widened blue eyes and sudden movement, and Harry couldn't help but smirk tauntingly as he slammed the door close.

 

"So you finally grew a backbone, eh?" Harry questioned with a smirk, intending it to be a joke.

 

However, Louis didn't seem to catch on to that.

 

"Would you so kindly shut the fuck up?" His shoulders were tense, Harry could practically see the knots from where he was.

 

"Lou, I was just joking-"

 

"I've had it with you thinking you can belittle me, belittle my existence by rendering me speechless," Louis sounded breathless, asphyxiated, and Harry felt like that now. "I'm fucking tired of you using my feelings for you against me. I'm sick of you making a joke out of me," he takes a huge breath, eyes crazy as they settle upon Harry. "Fuck you, Harry."

 

With that last claim Louis's chest was heaving up and down erratically, his nostrils exhaling forcefully- like an angered bull. Louis was really holding himself back, and for a long time. He's now a powerful force to reckon; strong, without a weight that used to be on his shoulders, now with a mix of plea and authority emanating from his being. His stance was so, so defensive on the verge of being threatening, and Harry felt himself tense, suddenly overwhelmed with the need to calm the furious lad down.

 

"Lou-"

 

"Don't you dare get close," Louis warned, backing away with every step forward Harry took. His hand, raised in a full palm, was shaking as he kept murmuring _no, no, no_ until his back hit the wall. Just when Harry reached him, Louis slid down the wall and broke down. His shoulders trembled with every shake and hiccup, small noises made their way out of Louis's lips like a broken melody, and Louis looked too small; Harry's chest tightened at the sight of him. Without any precedent or idea as to what the hell he was going to do, Harry picked him up, carried him to the bed and, once he himself sat down, placed him on his lap. Louis looked up at him, eyes red and brimmed with tears, and Harry kissed him softly before enveloping Louis's body with his own, covering him as if he were a safety blanket for a raging fire. Louis's head was firmly tucked into Harry's neck, his breath was falling harshly onto him, and Louis was slowly losing control. His body was losing its inhibitions, slinking down and melting into him, all soft and all beautiful. Harry's hands ran up and down Louis's back until he was boneless, completely seamless under Harry's control. And it was so sudden, so quick a change, that it's as if he's been waiting desperately for something of the sort to occur.

 

Harry knew they'd talk about it, they seriously needed to, but right now he couldn't think of that. Right now, with Louis's body tucked neatly into his own, Harry could only lie down, press a wet kiss onto Louis's forehead, secure his arm around his the smaller lad's waist, and fall asleep.

 

**June 16, 2013 - KFC Yum! Center, Louisville, United States**

 

They didn't talk about it the day after.

 

They didn't talk about the feelings thing, and the taking-over thing.

 

They just… didn't talk about if the next day.

 

In fact, it's been over two months, and they _still_ haven't talked about that fateful night. Instead, the day after, Harry woke up to a cold, companion-less bed at the crack of dawn. Also, to Louis mumbling to himself _idiot, you're such a fucking_ idiot as he made his way to the door, but Harry always chose to ignore that; if he ever dwelled on that, he'd have gotten up right that instance and would've shut Louis's nonsense with a harsh, heated kiss and a warm-hearted, soft-spoken chide.

 

And Harry, well, he seemed to always be haunted by the confessions. The first one was when they were still in X-Factor, and although Harry was the younger one he was the one with most difficulty to come to terms with it.

 

_Louis cornered him in the same bathroom Harry had cornered him nine weeks before. They'd just given the performance of their life and the adrenaline was still exhilaratingly coursing through their veins like a constant heroin injection, like an applied dose of endorphins had just been deposited. Harry liked coming to this bathroom because he'd avoid the annoying bustling (or lack thereof) of his fellow rivals- at least, that's what he told himself. He was sure that his affinity for this place had nothing to do with his first encounter with the beautiful blue-eyed being who was now in a band with him. Nothing at all, he's sure._

 

 _And that beautiful blue-eyed being, was cornering him. While he was cleaning off the stage makeup, of all times. At first Harry really didn't pay him attention- he had a gunk of_ something _in the corner of his eye and he'd be damned if he'd let it settle there- but once Louis started sniffling Harry whipped his head to gaze at him so quickly, it was a surprise he didn't get whiplash._

 

_Louis, beautiful Louis, was standing there, small and petite and sad, with tears streaming down his cheeks and onto his throat column. His hands were balled into fists as he looked at Harry with such pain, such anguish… Harry couldn't help but already feel guilty of something he probably didn't even do._

 

_He also felt a murderous glint flare up inside him, and a want to kill whatever made Louis cry, but that was far from important right now._

 

_"Lou?" Harry asked and stepped towards Louis slowly, like a hunter approaching his prey. Louis just looked at him as he did so, and once he was close enough Louis threw himself onto Harry and clung to him. Harry was quick to lift Louis's legs around his waist and grip him tightly, like he did that first day when they were all placed in a group together._

 

_"Lou?" Harry questioned once more, this time a bit softer. "What's wrong?"_

 

_Louis had his head nuzzled into the crook of Harry's neck, the flow of tears never seeming to stop. In between hiccups and shuddering breaths, Louis responds, "Everything."_

 

_Harry only grips tighter. "What do you mean?"_

 

_"I mean," Louis's hands search for purchase on Harry's back, clinging desperately onto him. "I mean I'll ruin everything."_

 

 _At that Harry's shocked. "What-What do you mean you'll ruin everything? There's really nothing_ you _can ruin,"_ because you're perfect.

 

_Louis, however, fervently shakes his head and clings harder. "Yes, yes there is. I can ruin so much. I can ruin toast, I can ruin my hair and makeup, I can ruin Liam's organized shelf, I can ruin you-"_

 

_"Ruin me?"_

 

_A shuddering breath. "Yes," his voice resembles heated metal, rusty and deteriorated. Weakened. "I can ruin you by telling you I love you."_

 

_And just like that, it's like all of Harry's breath leaves him at the same time. His knees feel as if they're going to give out, and his heart feels as if it's going to stop beating. And time, time feels as if it's stopped. Really, really stopped; as if all of this is occurring in slow motion, in a frozen time frame, and Harry can't breathe. "I-"_

 

_"It seems I've already ruined you," Louis's voice still resembles metal, but now it's cold and steely. He forces himself out of Harry's arms, still shaking and still crying, and wipes invisible dust off himself. He always seemed to manage himself with class, as if nothing affected him, as if he's covered in a slick substance throughout and every word slips off of him. "That's alright. I didn't expect you to say you loved me back, or for you to kiss me 'till I ran out of breath."_

 

But I want to.

 

_Louis turned around and just as he's about to leave, he whispered, "just… don't use this against me."_

 

_Harry only managed to process the door slam, too focused on trying to make his thoughts become words._

 

_However, the "I love you" he uttered back is met with lonely silence._

 

Harry's heart clenched every time he remembered that day. He often wondered if Louis remembered it as well; he must, but, still. It was the day where Harry felt a shift in their relationship- for good, always for good; but it definitely catalyzed the sparkling and shocking aura that always surrounded them whenever they were together. It was the moment where, when Louis and Harry cuddled the latter no longer thought _how long is this going to last?_ But instead _I can stay here forever_. Harry knew then and there, that Louis could be his forever.

 

However, for Louis it was different, Harry noticed. While Harry developed a feeling of belonging and security, Louis only grew anxious and insecure. Harry couldn't blame him, really; only once did he attempt to let Louis know about his returned feelings, and it was disastrous. He often wonders how it would be now if things had gone out how he planned it. If they'd be cuddling right now, sharing sweet kisses and soft giggles instead of how they are right now, Louis avoiding Harry like the plague on the other side of the backstage area and shifting uncomfortably, clearly feeling his stare on him.

 

Although that might also have to do with the whole taking control situation, something Harry was still confused about.

 

"Harry, we're on in five."

 

With a sigh, Harry willed these thoughts away and immediately did his pre-show rituals. He ate a green gummy bear, he hummed _forever young_ and tried to escape one of the security guards. Everything was alright in his world, so far.

 

However, when Harry went on to do his pre-show urination ritual (he _had_ to make it a ritual; otherwise he’d forget and have to go in the middle of the concert, and that was a huge _no_ ), he heard sniffling come from behind one of the bathroom stalls. He looked around to see if he was alone; once he made sure of that, he immediately identified where the sobbing came from and knocked on the door three times gently.

 

“Hey, is everything alright? Do you need help?” Harry called out but received no answer, just a pitiful sniffle in response. Therefore, he kept on knocking and knocking, calling out almost desperately, until the person hiding hit the door from his side with enough force to scare Harry and make him back away.

 

“Shit,” Harry murmured. “Look, I just want to make sure you’re okay, pal.”

 

“Don’t fucking call me pal.”

 

And _oh, that voice._ Harry could recognize that voice even if he were deaf.

 

“Lou?”

 

“Just- go away, Harry, I’ll be out soon,” Louis’s voice was weak, heavy and on the verge of breaking.

 

Harry only sighed, knowing that they were probably not going to make it in five minutes. “As if I’d go away.”

 

The door unlocked and with that alone a bit of the weight on Harry’s shoulders got lifted. If the crying wasn’t enough of a warning, looking at Louis was more than enough of a prompting to worry. He appeared meek and reserved, red-brimmed eyes full of unshed tears and cheeks flushed. His hands were shaking as well as his shoulders, his back curved into itself in a way that appeared painful, and he was, at the moment, the perfect humanistic representation of agony.

 

Harry immediately went down on his knees and pulled Louis into him, cradling his body, fitting it into his own, much like he did two months ago. The smaller lad didn’t stop sobbing but instead did so more forcefully, his chest now bumping achingly with Harry’s as he gasped for breath.

 

“Boo, what’s wrong?” And it’s been _so long_ since he last used that term for Louis, it felt like summoning a ghost. But, apparently, it was what was best.

 

“I can’t, Haz, I can’t- just,” Louis hiccupped. “I’m tired of having to be composed, of being always on top of things, and to be the responsible one. It’s driving me insane- I can’t- I’m not always in control, I don’t _want_ to be, I can’t.”

 

_They have a concert in two days, and their manager – Brian, he thinks his name is, Brian McGee; seems North American – was tossing magazines on top of their desk, fuming._

_“What the hell is this,” it wasn’t even a question and Louis was already slumped in his seat._

_“Sir, I-“_

_“We told you to stay on point, and make sure everything went out smoothly. But instead you practically outed yourself, rid yourself of a girlfriend, and didn’t stop Harry from puking on the street, Liam from going to a strip club, Niall from being in a hot tub full of men, and Zayn from completely disappearing from the picture!”_

_Louis’s head was hung in shame, and the four out of five were biting their lips, not knowing what to say._

_On the desk were magazines reporting One Direction’s “wild night”, last night. They had all gotten so smashed that Louis was hanging off burly men and letting them do body shots off him, Eleanor got caught making out with Mark, Harry forced the cab driver to pull over in order to puke on his way home, Liam got papped sweet-talking a stripper in a gentlemen’s club, Niall went on and on about brotherhood to the point where he convinced around fifteen men to get naked and join him in a hot tub… and Zayn got lost, but that’s not really surprising._

_What is surprising, however, is how all of this is getting blamed on Louis._

_“With all due respect, sir, we were the ones at fault. Louis had nothing to do-“_

_“Louis had everything to do with this!” Brian’s booming voice interrupted Niall and made all of them wince, and Louis slump even more. “He is the oldest! He needs to always be in control, and make sure you guys aren’t doing idiotic things like this!” He slammed his fist rather harshly throughout and it had them all jumping. “He’s the one who was fucking responsible of none of you getting drunk or lost or fucking outed!”_

That _had Harry standing up in his seat. “No,_ we _are responsible for ourselves. You can’t just expect Louis to-“_

_“Haz,” Louis cut him off with a voice so soft it almost went unheard. “He’s right.”_

_The silence among all of them was sepulchral. So Louis continued. “I-I was the one in charge of taking care of you guys, but I didn’t do so. Thanks to that we got papped doing things that’ll be awful for our image. I’m sorry, Mr. McGee. Won’t happen again.”_

_At that admission Brian sat down but the four out of five were stunned, still not quite believing that the blame is getting entirely pinned on Louis. And that they can’t do anything. And that Louis is okay with that._

“You don’t have to, you know,” Harry said to him sweetly, rubbing his hands up and down his back.

 

Louis only nodded and clawed at him desperately, wanting him to _understand_. “Yes, Haz. You were there. I have to.”

 

Harry was left without words. Or, rather, without a way to answer to him. Therefore, he just placed a soothing kiss on the top of his head. “If you were an internet browser, you’d be Firefoxy.” Louis let out a small laugh at that but was still too tense. “Relax, Boo.”

 

Louis was still stoic, refusing to calm down, but then Harry started pressing down on some of the knots he had on his back. At first Louis whined at the slight nudge of pain, but after it was untied he fell boneless onto Harry, letting out low mewls and whines every now and then. There was bustling and screaming outside but in this moment, it was as if they were the only two. At least they both only focused on one another; oblivious to their names being called, oblivious to the ruckus of fans shrieking their songs, oblivious to the world.

 

Ten minutes later, give or take, Louis was back to being _Louis_. The change was so sudden, it was as if the torn down Louis didn’t even exist. He just… crawled out of Harry’s embrace with a wide smile, a relaxed stance, and a glowing spirit.

 

“C’mon, Haz, we’ve got a show to put on.”

 

Those words seemed to mean more than what they were supposed to; nevertheless, with the words _don’t use it against me_ ringing loudly in his ears like a repeated mantra, Harry grabbed his hand and, for an instance, didn’t ever want to let go.

 

**July 8, 2014 - Estadi Olímpic, Barcelona, Spain**

 

Harry was crazy. He's losing his mind. He's either crazy or losing his mind, or both. He still hadn't quite caught up with the fact that both are synonyms by the time the concert was eighteen minutes away from starting, and that was… distressing, to say the least.

 

Today Louis was acting extremely weird. Not today per se; more like… this entire last year. He’s been picky, itchy and twitchy; snapping and sweet. He had been the incarnation of _mood swings_ , at one point being an absolute sweetheart and not even two seconds after being an absolute asshole. A fucking paradoxical enigma.

 

And lately, he’s been more edgy with Harry. His responses have not only gotten wittier but also rougher, more frequent. No matter how small the infraction Louis is billing him like a criminal, always aggravating Harry and himself even further with the simplest of things.

 

_“Hey, I lost my underwear, can I see yours?” He was serving himself cereal._

_Chairs scraping floor. Feet padding mercilessly on floor. He was no longer with cereal._

_“No, but maybe when you get your head out of your ass you’ll be able to find a proper hat; cover the tiny bits for a moment.” His cereal was long gone, dumped in the sink unforgivingly._

 

However, despite Louis answering back, Harry noticed something. He noticed how Louis's pupils dilated whenever Harry so much as talked to him, how his hands twitched and his tongue moistened his lips every few seconds whenever Harry so much as looked at him… How lax, soft and, crudely put, submissive he turned when Harry so much as touched him. His face, his hands, his body all leaned into him, like a heat-seeking missile, and, with his eyes fluttered shit, he completely gave in to Harry whenever he didn’t feel like putting up those walls.

 

_“So Harry, how has the tour been?”_

_“Oh, it’s been amazing! This year we’ve had the opportunity to…” He went on and leaned forward a bit, face expressing everything he said as his hands gestured and emphasized on important parts. Everyone was in their own little world, but Louis… Louis kept staring, all the time, at Harry, with huge heart eyes._

_Needless to say, that tape was deleted._

 

It freaked Harry out.

 

It made Harry even more aware and conscious of his surroundings, of himself, of Louis. And he became aware of certain things. He noted that, whenever nobody was around, Louis's gaze always softened when speaking to him, and that his voice lowered to the point that it was barely above a whisper when he replied. And Louis's stance changed. He no longer held himself erect, tall and strong, as if trying to impose authority with an air of ferocity and danger. No, now his stance no longer battled his petite-ness but instead enforced it. Now it seems as if he's making himself appear as small as he is on purpose- and not because he's insecure, like he used to do, but because _he likes feeling small_.

 

And Louis looked for Harry to make him feel small, which only evoked even more fear inside of Harry. It didn't seem much, but Harry knew Louis was giving himself to Harry, _giving in_ to Harry, for him to love, care and look after him. It's so much responsibility, and Harry loves Louis more than enough to do this for him. He's just scared he's going to do something wrong.

 

He'd have to learn by winging it, and today seemed as good of a day as any.

 

Louis was honest-to-deity being uncontrollable, and Harry was searching for him to stop the havoc he’s wreaking. He normally was a fucking menace, but today he was being so _on purpose_.

 

Louis woke up at around three-thirty in the morning to start wreaking havoc. First, he mooned one of the new bodyguards when said bodyguard refused to let him out of his room at three-forty in the morning. Then, he pantsed Liam while he was signing and taking selfies with some fans outside (he's sure the fans _loved_ it but Harry almost lost an eye trying to intercept Liam in his quest to kill Louis). After, he replaced the cream in some of the Oreos with toothpaste; Niall ate six of them before realizing they tasted horribly and was close to crying.

 

He didn't stop then. He tangled all of the bodyguards' ear and mic pieces, leaving them uncommunicated for almost half an hour; At some point during the day, he managed to print out some papers that said "Voice Activated due to sanitation reasons. Just scream BLOW and it will start. If this doesn't work, try screaming louder" and taped them onto every hand dryer in every bathroom, resulting in so many people screaming hysterically for a few minutes until they got it.

 

It was, overall, chaos. And everyone was pissed off- including Harry, even though Louis hadn’t done anything against him, personally.

 

After admittedly an hour and a half of searching, he finally found Louis by the snacks area, actually buying a fucking popcorn… with a bottle of chili powder in his hands. Oh no.

 

“Louis, what are you doing?”

 

Louis turned around, surprised at getting caught. He put on quick effort at hiding it behind his back but to no avail. “Hi, Harry, how are you on this fine day? The sunlight is falling beautifully down on you. Has your hair gotten longer?”

 

“Louis,” Harry said patiently, voice low and authoritative. “Give me the chili powder.”

 

“What chili pow-?”

 

“ _Louis_.”

 

With a heavy sigh and a bitter _fine_ , Louis handed him the powder, grumbling under his breath, dirty hands touching Harry’s own at the exchange. Louis then looked jittery, out of place, looking all around except at Harry, at any part of Harry. He seemed as if he wanted to escape, but was waiting for _something_ in order to do so.

 

“Why,” Harry tested the words out in his mind before saying them out loud. “Why are you behaving like such a child?”

 

Louis huffed at the accusation, arms crossed in front of his chest in defiance, eyes widened in outrage. “I am not.”

 

“Yeah, you are.”

 

“No, I’m not.”

 

“Yes you- Louis, are we seriously doing this right now? This only further proves my point!”

 

“Well, _okay_ , what makes you _think_ I’m acting like a child?”

 

Something about the way he said it made Harry sure he wasn’t about to admit he was wrong any time soon. “You’re fucking with everyone, pulling pranks and shenanigans.”

 

“No, I’m not.”

 

“Yes, you- _god_ , Louis, stop it,” Harry’s exasperated, hands tossing his hair over and over again in an attempt to calm down. “Louis, you did, why can’t you just admit it?”

 

Louis’s bewildered now, and Harry just _knows_ this won’t be over soon. “I wouldn’t pull pranks and stuff, please, Harry. Where’s your proof?”

 

“ _Proof?_ Everyone saw you!”

 

Louis scoffed. “That’s not proof, that’s you taking everyone’s word over mine. Show me a picture, a video; otherwise, you can’t say shit.”

 

Harry rubbed his hands over his face painfully. Harry loved Louis, he really did, but it was at times like this when the soul-consuming need to fucking kill him wanted to be turned into action.

 

“Okay, okay, okay,” Harry grabbed Louis’s hands and got an idea. It might work, it might not; he’s basing his predictions on movies. “Lou, what I’m about to do reflects in every way how I feel towards you.”

 

“What’re you- _omf_ ,” Louis’s cut off by Harry kissing him harshly, grabbing his face and angling it favorably towards him. Louis reciprocated easily and placed his hands on Harry’s hips, getting lax by giving total control to him. Harry only kissed him harder, licking his bottom lip and forcing him to open his mouth, licking inside as well, eliciting moans and whines from Louis. When they got to the point where they needed to breathe again, Harry placed his hand on Louis’s back and, after feeling over softly, pressured on a node in Louis’s shoulder blades that had the smaller boy’s knees actually buckle and his muscles loosen entirely. He then pulled away, looking at a dazed, flushed Louis with a self-control he didn’t know he had in him.

 

“Stop messing around, and let’s go. We have rehearsals.” And he left quickly, soon after followed by Louis, once the smaller boy came out of his stupor.

 

-

 

“Hey, Haz?”

 

“Mm?”

 

Louis was shy, for the first time in months, and he twiddled with his thumbs as he sat on Harry’s lap. “What’d you mean back then?”

 

“Today, you mean?” Harry mused, playing dumb. “What are you referring to?”

 

“Don’t be such an ass,” Louis hit his shoulder admonishingly. “What did you mean when you said it reflected everything you felt? For me?”

 

Harry placed Louis’s hands around his neck and got close enough to have their lips be inches apart. “I love you, you idiot.” And dived in, kissing Louis breathless.

 

“Oh,” Louis said softly, looking at Harry with a gentle gaze. “I suspected that.”

 

“My turn,” Harry laughed. “What happened when I, like, pressed on your shoulder blade?”

 

Louis pulled back a bit and looked at the ceiling, at the floor, at the bed, at the freaking TV. Harry, however, immediately grabbed his chin and firmly placed him staring at him. “I don’t know,” Louis said steadily, his eyes clouding up. “I just- relaxed, I don’t know.”

 

“Hmm,” Harry hummed. “Are you okay with me doing that?”

 

Louis nodded quickly. “Yeah, I trust you.”

 

Those words sparked _something_ in Harry; something quite impossible to describe. It was this sense of fulfillment, of… who knows, of _something_.

 

“What else would you be okay with me doing?” And that, this is as close as they’ve gotten to talking about it. “I know it’s something to do with me taking over, right?”

 

Louis gulped loudly, tensing up once more. “Yeah, that okay with you?”

 

“Okay with me, ‘course,” Harry pressed his face against the column of Louis’s neck. “What else?”

 

“’M not quite sure, but just- I don’t know, I like being… coddled,” Louis admitted sheepishly. “Like having you care for me. Show me that you love me, and stuff.”

 

Harry hummed and nodded, pecking Louis softly before looking at him, prompting him to continue. “Just- control me, in every way possible. I- I like that, a lot, just. I don’t know what you want me to say. But that.”

 

Louis’s breath was short and Harry knew he was _trying_ , but the words didn’t come to him. “Alright, Boo. I can do that, definitely. Just don’t get crazy, alright?”

 

The smaller lad laughed at him and nodded. Right about the time where it seemed like the conversation was over, Harry felt the need to include a _very_ important aspect, in his opinion.

 

“Would you be okay if this was, like, a sex thing as well? Us, I mean,” Harry’s lips were practically on top of Louis’s already, and his hands – by their own, of course – slipped under Louis’s shirt.

 

_“Never have I ever had a friend with benefits!”_

_Liam was vindictive; he used the “hey, let’s go celebrate the end of TMH by drinking” against them. He was purposefully getting them drunk, Harry was sure of it. And it was because at the end of UAN all of them drank, illegally some, while he just stood in the corner and glared. Harry’s sure._

_All of them downed their shot, except Louis. Zayn and Niall laughed – not_ at _him,_ with _him – while Liam was shocked. Harry wasn’t, not really; two weeks ago Louis had confessed to him that he was still a virgin._

_“You haven’t, Tommo? But what about Eleanor?” Liam asked, while the other two idiots kept laughing._

_“Nah, wasn’t my type,” Louis murmured, looking solemnly at the full shot glass. “Besides, it’s not like I don’t_ want _to. With someone. Someday.”_

_That had Harry reeling, and he quickly looked at the blushing Louis. “You wanna have a friend with benefits?”_

_Louis blushed even more as he refused to look at him, staring always at the ground as he shrugged. “Dunno, yeah, I guess. It’d be fun.”_

_“So if any of us one day came up to you and asked, you’d say yes?” Harry pressed._

_“One of you, yes,” Louis said softly. Liam was no longer paying attention to them, now trying to stop the others from laughing. “I’d be okay with that.”_

_“And what would you do?”_

_Louis let out an undignified squeak and threw the alcohol at Harry’s face. “Harry, shut up, don’t go too far.”_

_His tone was joking, and it’s not the first time he’s thrown somebody alcohol tonight, but it’s definitely the first time Louis’s ever stopped him from crossing a line._

Louis nodded and nodded, desperately, frantic. “Yeah, yeah, definitely okay. Just don’t use it against me.”

 

At that Harry brought their lips together, softly at first but later on tongues met, breaths were exchanged, and when they separated there was a slick line of saliva hanging from both of them. Both of them were getting hard, pressing against one another doesn’t hide much, so Harry moved his hand first to his mouth and spit on it; then, towards Louis’s sweats and slipped it under, quickly noticing something: Louis was fucking commando.

 

“ _Shit_ ,” Harry murmured against his lips. “You’re going to be the death of me.”

 

“Hope so,” Louis panted and moaned once Harry grabbed Louis’s cock firmly in his hand. They didn’t have much to lighten up the coarseness, just spit, but it was enough for Harry to agilely move his hand up and down, twisting it from time to time. Louis grabbed onto his back for purchase, gripping and scratching as an outlet, moaning loudly in Harry’s mouth. Harry smeared the precum on Louis’s head and used it as lubricant as well, and went faster; fondling his balls when his hand went down every fourth time, scratching lightly over the vein at the underside of Louis’s cock, and gripping more tightly at the base.

 

Louis then stopped moaning and started panting into Harry’s mouth, accompanied by Harry who decided to search for release by grinding onto Louis’s thigh in synch of his hand movements. Harry went on faster, and faster, and _faster,_ until Louis couldn’t and fell seamlessly, coming hard and letting the orgasm spasm his body and take over him.

 

Harry wasn’t long after, coming in his tracks against Louis’s thigh. Harry took his hand out of Louis’s pants and used it, come-stained and all, to tilt Louis’s head towards him and kiss him desperately. Louis weakly responded, but it was clear the orgasm drained him entirely, and they both fell asleep; kissing each other, breathlessly.

 

**Two Weeks Ago - Local Beach, Los Angeles, California**

 

The sun was warm and hot, hitting Louis with its rays in a way that made Harry want to whisper _tu est trés chaud_ in his ear and have the rays bake the blush perpetually on his always rosy cheeks. He wanted to murmur and groan while the heat left Louis dehydrated and unable to speak, and Harry could serve as the water to quench his thirst. Most of all, though, the sun was so, so arduous that it made sweat roll down Louis's forehead and made his clothing stick to his skin in a way that had Harry literally breathless, that forced him to think poetically and write sonnets in his mind until he could eventually, finally sing them out in rhythm of his thrusts with Louis reaching all the high notes.

 

In other words, Louis looked really fucking hot in the beach, only rivaling the sun invading the beach. And Harry was sporting.

 

"Haz, let's go in the water!" Louis rasped out when he reached Harry, chest heaving heavily from the volley game with a stranger. Harry had been playing before with her but Louis wanted to join in and, knowing how competitive he got, Harry decided it'd be best for him to sit this one down and just… admire Louis from afar.

 

"Y'done playing, then?"

 

"Yeah. Just beat her arse. Twenty-five to twelve."

 

Harry laughed loudly, head thrown back because that meant Louis had lost.

 

 “Sure, love,” Harry said soothingly, running his hands through Louis’s wispy hair. “I’ll go soon, just waiting for Ben to come with the new representative. We’re here to discuss new ideas, ‘member?”

 

Louis nodded and smiled at him. “M’kay, I’ll wait here with you.”

 

Ben and the new rep came almost forty minutes after; Louis had gotten tired of waiting, so he started helping a little kid build a sand castle. It was honestly really fucking adorable.

 

“Hey, Harry,” Ben greeted him with a hug and a smile. There was a woman next him; she was beautiful, with her curly hair in an afro and her chocolate brown eyes brimmed with mascara and light makeup. She really was a sight to see. “This, is Nydia. She’ll be the new rep.”

 

“Hi, Nydia,” Harry extended his arm, which she gladly took. “I’m Harry.”

 

“Yeah, I know,” she chuckled and smiled. “Kind of had to, in order to get this job.”

 

“Right.”

 

From then on it was all business. Ben had disappeared who knows where, the sun was still arduous, and Louis was now helping two other kids. What a day to be alive.

 

“That’s Louis, right? Louis Tomlinson?” Nydia asked, pointing at who Harry had been looking at… this entire time, admittedly.

 

“Yeah, he is.”

 

“Do you think he’d like for it to be his girlfriend’s hand in the video?” Her question was so innocent, it really was, but it was like a small fire in a forest for Harry.

 

Harry immediately shook his head and stared at her. “He doesn’t have a girlfriend; they broke up.”

 

“Oh,” Nydia murmured. “Well, is he with someone? Or should we hire whoever to act the part?”

 

“He’s with me,” Harry corrected and _why would he do that?_ “We’re together.” Jealousy is a horrible thing.

 

However, she only stared at him in disbelief. “I’m sorry, but that seems highly unlikely.”

 

Suddenly she wasn’t so pretty anymore. “Louis!” Harry called out to him. Louis looked up immediately, confusion clouding his eyes. “Lou, come on over here.”

 

Louis did, and it was obvious he expected to be introduced to the woman, but Harry had other plans. He draped his arm around Louis’s waist and pulled him towards him. Louis gasped at the sudden notion.

 

“Haz, what’re you-?”

 

“See? We’re definitely together, so no need to pay any actress,” Harry wasn’t entirely sure if this was okay with Louis, but according to the shivering beside him he was going to go with yes.

 

However, Nydia wasn’t entirely convinced. “Don’t know, still doesn’t sell, love.”

 

Harry actually growled at the statement and glanced down at Louis, leaning down to whisper: “I’m going to kiss you now.”

 

“What? Harry, don’t-“

 

“What’s the matter?” Harry said lowly, holding onto Louis’s hands, which were now on his chest trying to pull him away a bit. “C’mon, help me out. Carry the burden with me.”

 

_The second time Louis confessed his feelings for Harry, was the night of the Red or Black performance._

_Harry was sitting in the corner of his room, sobbing like an idiot because he fucking_ was _one. He messed up their first real live performance because of his stupidity; the good image they were supposed to establish that night, disappeared._

_So now Harry was on the floor, searching up the hateful comments of himself and thinking “I deserve it” while reading each and every single one of them. He deserved to feel like shit; he made the band look like it._

_“Oh, Haz,” Louis murmured as he saw Harry on the floor and immediately threw himself at him, gathering him into a big hug. “Haz, ‘tis not your fault, babe.”_

_“Yeah, it is,” Harry’s voice was rough and broken. “I fucking messed it all up! Everyone thinks so as well.”_

_“No, you didn’t,” Louis corrected and took his phone, reading a bit before tossing it to the bed. He then kissed Harry’s curls soothingly, curling around him. “Who cares what people think?”_

_“I care, Louis,” Harry admitted lowly. “I care.”_

_At that Louis’s breath hitched and he started running his hands up and down Harry’s arms in a comforting way. “Haz,” he licked his lips and took a deep breath. “I know it seems important, but it isn’t, not really. Only matters what the people you love and who love you, think, darling, and we’re all proud.” He wiped some of Harry’s tears with his thumb with fleeting kisses. “I love you, with all of my heart, so much that at times it’s like I’m about to burst. And, until you stop caring, I’ll help. In any way possible.”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“I will do whatever I can to help you please people,” Louis said softly, putting his head on top of Harry’s. “That way, the two of us can handle the burden.”_

 

Louis’s eyes widened and he pushed Harry back. “Leave me alone, Harry.”

 

Nydia was still looking, and she chuckled at Louis outwardly refusing him. Harry was getting a bit ticked off, and he read in an essay somewhere that some subs like it (because although they haven’t put a _name_ to it, he knew that their relationship was one based on dominance and submission), so he took the chance.

 

“Oh no you don’t,” Harry pulled him in once more and tried to feel around Louis’s upper back for his shoulder blade. Louis immediately realized what he was doing and fucking stepped on Harry, _hard_ , and slapped him.

 

The blow was rough and Harry stepped backwards, looking at Louis incredulously, who returned him the same glance. Only he had tears falling down his cheeks. _Shit_.

 

“You said you weren’t going to use it against me,” and with those fleeting words Louis left, running towards the hotel without glancing back.

 

-

 

“I’m so sorry, Lou, just- look at me, please.”

 

Louis not once turned around, forcing Harry to face his back as he apologized relentlessly. The smaller lad was still fuming, and Harry’s insistence didn’t help much. “I was an ass, okay? I get it,” Harry admitted softly, biting his lip. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t- I didn’t-“

 

“Didn’t what?” Louis’s back was still in front of him.

 

“Didn’t know that was _not_ okay,” Harry plastered himself to Louis’s back and wrapped his arms around his waist. “We talked about the do’s, sort of, but never once mentioned the don’ts. I thought it was fair game, I don’t know. I googled it, and it’s a pretty popular thing, humiliation kink.”

 

“You googled it?” Louis’s surprised voice hurt a tiny bit, he’s not going to lie.

 

“Of course I did,” Harry nuzzled his face into the junction between shoulder and neck. “’s just makin’ sure I’m doing ev’rything right.”

 

Louis placed his hands on top of Harry’s and tossed his head back slightly. “What you did today, was shit, you know, but,” Louis bit his lip and sighed. “Thank you. For. You know.”

 

He replied by shaking his head and pressing a soft kiss on Louis’s collarbone. “We’ve gotta talk ‘bout it, though.”

 

Louis sighed again and nodded, leading them both slowly towards the bed. Initially, he was going to sit down and discuss it like that, but Harry didn’t want this intimacy spell broken just yet; therefore, he dragged Louis to him towards the headboard, Louis’s back pressed against his chest in such a close way that he felt Louis’s heartbeat thrum happily alongside his own.

 

“So…”

 

“Um,” Louis gulped loudly and, with a trembling voice, started. “I don’t like being pressured in public, or humiliated. At all.”

 

Harry laughed softly. “Yeah, kind of got that today.”

 

“’S not okay, but. I understand, love,” Louis replied, curling in on himself. “Don’t you dare fucking call me a tramp. Or a whore. Or a bitch. Or- you know what? Just don’t call me any of those names.”

 

“’T was on my list as well,” Harry agreed. “Wouldn’t be able to.”

 

Louis hummed and turned around a bit, just to look at Harry in the eyes. “The thingy with the- with the _pressing_ , on my shoulder blades. Not in public. That’s something that has to be between us.”

 

“Alright,” Harry took advantage of Louis being this close and ran his hands lightly over Louis’s tummy and chest. Louis’s breath hitched at the mere touch, and it was getting more frantic by the second, each time Harry neared his thumbs to his nipples. “Can I ask you a question?”

 

“You already did, dumbass,” his pitch was higher and he sounded breezy.

 

“Okay?”

 

“I’m not doing that John Green shit with you, Haz.”

 

“This was supposed to be a sweet moment!”

 

A long silence settled upon them. “I still want to go into the water.”

 

**Present Day, starting five hours ago - Hotel Bar, Birmingham, London**

 

Louis’s drunk.

 

That has to be it. Otherwise, there’s really no explanation for Louis grinding on almost every man in the room, and letting them do body shots.

 

“Man, Louis is _really_ having fun, huh?” Niall comments and all of them laugh, they fucking laugh while Harry feels like the floor is slowly but surely swallowing him whole.

 

“Oh, Harry isn’t so happy about that!” Zayn, the fucking idiot, hollers out loud. Harry quickly looks back and, no, Louis didn’t hear. He’s too busy flirting with the bartender.

 

 _Shit_.

 

“Okay, lads, I’m going to, um, go,” Harry excuses himself pathetically, making the rest laugh as he turns his back. Bastards.

 

He makes his way quickly towards Louis, who is _still_ flirting with the bartender.

 

“How’d you know my drink was the screwdriver?” Louis sys oh so charmingly, fluttering his long eyelashes at the bartender – Tony’s his name, or summat -, leaning forward.

 

“You just seem like the kind of guy I’d like to screw,” Tony says with a wink and _oh, that really fucking sucked._

 

Nevertheless it has Louis giggling, so adorable and so beautiful and _no, this can’t happen._

 

Harry presses himself against Louis’s back then, his crotch perfectly aligned with Louis’s bum, and he leans down to flutter kisses on Louis’s neck and whisper, “if I flip a coin, what are the chances of me getting head?”

 

Louis turns around and, with a sneer, hikes his leg on Harry’s waist, pressing their crotches together while he replied, “50/50, dumbass. Even you have to have some sort of knowledge on probabilities.”

 

“Why are you doing this?” Harry asks, biting on his ear lobe and grinding onto him, moving his hands to grip his bum. The bartender is long gone, attending someone from the other side of the bar.

 

“Doing what? Enjoying myself?” Louis moans, wrapping his hands around Harry’s neck and tilting his own to give him more access. “Well, because it’s my last night out, so I kind of have to.”

 

“You’re out of control!” It comes out of Harry’s lips as a grunt, since Louis decided then to turn around and press his bum, and it’s extremely unfair.

 

“What’re you gonna do about it, stud?” Louis’s voice comes out drawled, seductive, and Harry’s had enough.

 

“I’m going to put you in your place,” Harry growls and elevates Louis, making him wrap his legs around his waist, and instantly takes him upstairs, grinding and kissing the entire way.

 

They go into Louis’s room and start discarding their clothes. They only got to shirts off when Harry, being stupid, ruins the moment.

 

“Save a horse, ride a cowboy.”

 

“What cowboy?” Louis laughs out loud, eyes crinkling like they always do, and his mouth moved, words came out, and, well, it’s the perfect answer for the moment yet somehow it’s still a surprise, so big a surprise that Harry even steps away until his back hit the wall.

 

Harry should have expected it, it was just bound to happen someday, but it’s an honest-to-heart surprise when Louis propositions it.

 

"Well? Do you want to or not?"

 

Harry feels his heartbeat go a mile a second, and the only word that stumbles out of his lips are "what?"

 

But Louis only smiles at him and walks gallantly at him, like a vulture circling its prey. "You said you were going to put me in my place. Was that all smack talk, or are you up to the challenge?"

 

"You've been doing this a lot," Louis searches for _something_ inside of one of the many bags he has in his room and, with a soft _aha!_ He takes out a CD. It looks familiar, it really does… _oh, shit_.

 

"Remember this, Hazza?" Louis questions, a smirk plastered on his lips and his eyes shining like stars full of mischief, while Harry only turned beet red. "You loved to see me flustered, and this was the ultimate way, wasn't it?"

 

And it _was_ , if he's honest.

 

_They'd finished the set list for the night, and the theater was already closed. On his way to the room he shared with Louis, Harry tried to get his mind off what he was about to do, and pointed out to himself similarities and differences from how they used to do shows in X-Factor to how they're doing shows now, in this "preparatory tour"._

 

 _He got to around three or four until the item in his hands started tingling, actually tingling, burning the pads of his fingers. Harry couldn’t keep the shit-eating grin from disappearing, and he desperately wanted it to go away or else Louis would find out. It's just- Harry wasn't_ surprised _when he found out Louis loved him. He wasn't, not really. The catalytic state of shock he was induced in by the words was just… a painful reaction towards the admittance, that's all. But he knew, deep down inside, and he loved him back - which was something he knew beforehand as well; it wasn't as if he found out when he was left alone, with the words stuck in his throat, scrambling for an escape - yet wasn't sure exactly how to say it. Harry already knew how Louis felt about the whole ordeal, he'd made it quite clear with the whole "ruin you" speech, but maybe, just maybe, he'd be able to convince him; to change his mind about the situation, and turn it around positively. Maybe he'd be able to get Louis to be okay with loving him._

 

 _And Harry was planning to do so, eventually; but first, he needed to clear the air. He needed Louis to know about his feelings yet was too afraid and self-conscious to actually_ say _it. With this, though, with what he had in his hands, he's sure he'd get Louis aware and on board._

 

_Harry had to stop twice on his way to make sure he was calm, cool, collected and without a cheeky grin. He successfully managed to calm it down, and when he entered their room he was met with Louis padding softly, on the way to his bed. His eyes widened a bit at seeing Harry, alert in case it's a stranger, but once he recognized him his defenses lowered._

 

_"Haz," Louis mumbled and rubbed his right eye with his sweater paw. Harry felt like dying. "Whassup?"_

 

_Harry didn't answer, just walked towards Louis and thrusted at him the item in his hands, looking at him straight in the eye as he did so. Louis was confused for a moment, dubious as to what was going on, but eventually his brain seemed to catch up and he glanced at the object in befuddlement. Puzzled, he looked up at Harry before looking down at it again. "A CD?"_

 

_"Mhm," Harry nodded. "Turn it around."_

 

_"But what's it for-"_

 

_"You'll see, just- just turn it around, and you'll see."_

 

_And Louis did, and with the acknowledgement of what was on it his legs gave out, and he literally passed out in front of Harry with only a squeak of embarrassment and too-quick coloring of cheeks as a warning._

 

_On the disk, it was written, boldly, with a sharpie: **I think a lot about eating you out**._

Harry’s face goes beet red as Louis just twists the disk between his index and middle finger, walking closer and closer to Harry. “D’you still, hm? Wanna try?”

 

“That was my attempt to tell you that I liked you.” Harry looks at the disk, then at Louis, then back at the disk, and then back at Louis. His pulse is quickening by the second, so much that Harry fears a heart attack at the moment (maybe the blood is coursing way too quickly and way too much to his dick; if it’s because of that, he’ll happily have a heart attack). He’d learned how to not only look but _see_ Louis throughout the years; to notice even the small tells, the tiny twitches, the imperceptible signs. And now, now Louis appears to be playing it cool but his fingers are spasming every now and then, and his eyes are still all over the place. Louis wants to seem in control… the thought makes Harry smirk.

 

Harry easily pushes himself off the wall and bumps into Louis head-on, and, as he keeps walking, he forces him to take a few steps back until he has no choice but to lie on the bed. Harry towers over him the entire time, putting both hands besides his head. His lust-filled eyes give Louis about three or four one-overs until, finally, with Louis’s skin prickling in anticipation, Harry leans down towards his throat. He bumps his head on Louis’s chin softly, much like Tramp did to Lady, forcing Louis to tilt his head and give more access. Harry drags his lips in an open-mouthed kiss over the marbled column of Louis’s neck, stopping once on top of his pressure point. He can feel Louis’s heart beat quickening below his lips, and Harry licks over the pressure point twice, making Louis moan loudly and arc his back.

 

Harry leans back again and looks straight at Louis, a smirk on his lips. “Looks like ‘m not the only one who wants.”

 

Louis opens his mouth to reply but Harry quickly cuts him off by kissing him, tilting his head sideways to indirectly make Louis open his mouth a bit wider, letting Harry slip his tongue inside and completely devour him. The taller lad, obviously having the upper hand, dominates Louis’s mouth; licking into every crevice, running over his teeth, sucking his tongue. Louis’s letting out soft mewls that are driving Harry crazy.

 

Harry separates Louis’s legs and literally went down on him, pushing his hair back in order to have his entire throat exposed. Harry starts littering kisses from there, working with one hand the button and zipper on Louis’s pants and his own after, taking them and their pants off.

 

“Haz, Haz, please, just” his back arcs as Harry takes one of Louis’s nipples into his mouth, moaning and trembling all throughout. “ _Please_ , Harry, _god_ , just- just do something!”

 

“Aren’t I doing something already, though?” Harry smirks and quickly shuts Louis up with kisses, murmuring “don’t speak, unless it’s to praise me.”

 

“So arrogant,” Louis chuckles and Harry actually places his cupped hand on his mouth as he keeps kissing lower and lower, right up until his mouth is hovering oh so teasingly over Louis’s erection. Yet that really isn’t in Harry’s plans.

 

“Flip.”

 

Louis’s confused at first but after about a second or two he turns over, arching his back sinfully, propping his arse in the air.

 

“I wasn’t kidding,” Harry murmurs, placing his hands on the warm flesh and kneading it, causing Louis to moan brokenly into the sheets. “When I said I think a lot about eating you out, I wasn’t kidding.”

 

“I know,” Louis gasps out as Harry runs his fingers lightly over his hole. “My arse is fucking perfect, and your mouth was made for eating arse, I’m sure.”

 

Harry laughs loudly and kisses over the tender skin, biting at times. “I thought I told you to be quiet.”

 

“Maybe I’ll fucking shut up when you- _oh_ ,” Louis keens, fingers finding purchase on the sheets while Harry presses fleeting kisses on his hole, occasionally sticking his tongue out, all teasing. Louis starts hitting the bed, desperate, waiting for Harry to respond but when he realizes Harry’s relentless he just gives up and slumps forward, taking whatever he’s willing to give. Harry smiles against the crease of Louis’s cheeks and whispers _that’s what I’ve been waiting for, bub_ before actually working.

 

Harry spreads Louis’s cheeks apart and licks repeated stripes in a matter of seconds, not letting him get used to it. Louis whines out a soft, involuntary _yeah_ as he feels Harry’s chapped, cold lips against him, and he starts pulling on his own hair to try and gain some purchase. Harry’s alternating between licking around the rim and biting at it, using his thumb and index finger to pull at the skin around and make the drags longer. When Harry knows Louis will want more, he changes his angle a bit and slowly slips his tongue inside his warm, wet hole.

 

“Ah,” Louis breathes out and it sounds so airy, so breezy, as if it’s been all he’s waited for. Louis unconsciously jiggles his arse in Harry’s face and, well, how could he resist? With his index finger Harry opens Louis’s hole a bit and licks into him, tasting him through and through. Louis’s trying to remain still, he’s aware of that, but he’s also rutting his pulsing cock on the mattress for some kind of relief.

 

“Can’t come,” Harry warns, opting for kissing his arse as he rummages around the floor for the packet of lube he brought (just in case, he swears; it’s not like he predicted something like this occurring… of course not). “At least, not until I’m fully inside you.”

 

“But-“

 

“ _Louis_ ,” Harry pulls on his hair again, exposing his throat and making his back arc; Louis just looked even more delectable, _fuck_. “Just let go.”

 

And, just like that, Louis’s muscles completely relaxed and his body melted into the bed; it’s as if… as if he was waiting for Harry to tell him to do so. At that Harry finds the lube, slicks his fingers and instantly wriggles one of them inside of Louis.

 

“Jesus, you’re just swallowing my finger,” Harry’s awed, he’s really awed. “How many‘ve you had, honest?”

 

“Honest?” Louis murmurs, not quite sure Harry really wants an answer. “None.”

 

“None?”

 

“None,” Louis whines as Harry works in a second finger, slowly thrusting and sometimes crooking them. “You’re the first one to eat my arse, finger my arse and, soon enough, fuck my arse.”

 

Once Harry’s sure Louis’s accustomed to two he inserts the third one, thrusting all of them at a faster rate than how he did so before. “Good,” he says gruffly, kissing Louis’s spine and shoulder blades. “’ll be the first and last. Can I-?”

 

Louis shakes his head, so Harry retracts his hands from Louis’s upper back. With those words uttered Harry starts fucking Louis earnestly, plunging the three fingers easily over and over until it’s at synch with Louis’s moans and pants. Louis’s hard, painfully so; Harry’s hard, agonizingly so. They’re both suffering. And Louis’s whines aren’t making it easier for Harry.

 

“Okay, okay, condom? Or?” Harry’s gotten his fingers out and is already slicking up his cock, bare.

 

“No, ‘tis okay, trust you.”

 

Harry admittedly lets out a belated noise and he turns Louis around. “Wanna see your face,” Harry mutters and kisses Louis languidly, savoring his taste and touch as he slowly, gently starts pushing in. Louis’s face is already scrunching up in pain; therefore, Harry places his legs on his shoulder to try and make it easier but it’s still quite a feat. He isn’t exactly small.

 

“I hate your massive prick,” Louis grunts, still scrunched up in pain once Harry’s settled in, waiting for Louis to adjust to the feeling. “Such a big, giant, large, immense, huge pain in my arse.”

 

Harry growls a bit and bites at Louis’s collarbone teasingly. “I get it, I’m too well-endowed, can we, you know, get a move on?”

 

“Well, I don’t know, can we?” And _oh_ , Louis’s right eyebrow is quirked in a challenging way. He’s challenging him.

 

“Are you seriously challenging me? Right now?” Harry’s not really in the conversation, so it’s all coming out between low grunts and moans. His head is still trying to process Louis’s warm heat enveloping him easily, lovingly.

 

However, Louis shrugs and it makes Harry wonder if he was ever in any kind of pain at all. “I don’t know, am I?”

 

“I hate it when you do this.”

 

“I love you when you do _this_ ,” Louis wiggles his bottom and tosses his head back in a loud, high-pitched moan. “ _Fuck_ , this feels so good, wow.”

 

“This is my first time doing this to you, your reasons to love me are getting temporal,” Harry shifts a bit and starts snapping his hips now, thrusting into Louis earnestly while grunting, moaning and whining all at once at just how _good_ it all feels. “Also, didn’t I tell you, like- _Jesus fucking Christ_ \- like, half an hour ago, to shut the fuck up?”

 

Louis’s knuckles are white from holding too tightly onto the sheets, and his head is pressed to the side as a way to calm down. “How can I shut up when you’re _fucking me like this_?” That last part comes out in a whine as Harry speeds up, hands grabbing onto Louis’s side as he watches his cock go in and out of Louis’s hole and nuzzling his head soon after in Louis’s neck because it was _too much_.

 

Suddenly it’s all silent except for the sound of skin slapping skin and their harsh, heavy breaths. After ten minutes of grunts, moans, whines and thrusts he notices that Louis is crying, actually fucking crying silently. At first he fears he’s doing something wrong until he just _knows_.

 

“You can come, darling.”

 

And Louis is undone, coming so hard his thighs and legs shake and his entire body shudders, eyes rolling to the back as he lets out a soft, almost imperceptible mewl. It doesn’t take much besides seeing Louis become boneless and almost knocked out from the pleasure to get Harry to come inside of him, biting his neck hard enough to draw blood.

 

After that, Harry falls besides Louis and draws him in. They’re both sweaty and dirty, chests heaving erratically, entire bodies flushed, yet they still manage to wrap themselves around each other. Sharing sweet kisses, soft touches, meaningful glances… they settled into a place where Harry’s only thought was: _I can stay here forever_.

 

“So, what does this mean?”

 

“We’re a couple now, I guess.”

 

“I’m okay with that.”

 

“You better be, you’re fucking stuck with me from now on.”

 

…

 

“Hey, Lou?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“So you, like, don’t like letting go completely during sex? Or me touching your shoulder blades, the thing?”

 

“You’re not being coherent, love. But, like, I like it when you dominate me. Just don’t shut me up. And none of that “putting me in my place” crap. I thought it was sexy, but it seems animalistic now… and I’m not really fond of you using the shoulder blade thing a lot, don’t like what it does.”

 

“Alright, I can do that, yeah. We still have time to keep exploring. And stuff.”

 

…

 

“Hey, Lou?”

 

“Mmm. Yeah, Haz?”

 

“Did you sit in a pile of sugar? ‘Cause you have a pretty sweet ass.”

 

“Fuck you.”


End file.
